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Burn After Reading

Burn After Reading

 

and some random old birthday crap from the blog-40×40 from way the heck back when I was 39-

Fearing my birthday…

 

As I get closer to 40 I think about what I have learned, and want to pass along to hkp-9, jctp-6, and kep-3.I was inspired by a song by Tim Wilson, about his crazy uncle who told him there were 100 things a man needs to know to survive.he then told him 39 of them and died.some of my favorites of his are- never fry bacon without a shirt ontell her you love her until she puts down the butcher knife.if you say I do, be the ugly onecosmo is never in a happy homebream and bass ain’t health foodmine are not as funny as his, but here are 40 things I have found to be true, some are wisdom, some are crap.1. clear pee is happy pee.2. life is not fair.3. you can do anything that you think you can.4. get up early- always.5. stay up late- sometimes.6. when in doubt, get the club sandwich, it’s just about bulletproof!7.  shaken always beats stirred.8. If you are asking if the pork chop in the biscuit is fried or grilled, you have issues.9. what comes around goes around.10. payback is hell.11. ideal mexican lunch- pico de gallo, beans, and tortillas- that’s just about bulletproof!12. close enough rarely is.13. martinis and breasts come in pairs for a reason. at least, they should.14. tires come in sets of 4 for a reason, don’t confuse rule 13 and 14, they are not transferable.15. neither the lender nor borrower be.16. curried goat is always better than oxtails.17. never open the first fortune cookie.18. 6×7=42. know it. live it.19. eat new and disturbing foods.20. buy new music- not just bands you know well.21. always double check the math.22. some friends are lifetime, some friends are fair weather. get used to it.23. admit when you make a mistake.24. learn from 23, and don’t repeat it.25. be a good host,and be a better guest.26. skip the tv, there is no reality there.27.laugh till you fall out of your chair. passing out is optional, but amusing.28.have a favorite author. know his or her work well enough to be able to retell it, with great detail and gusto. be offended when peter jackson makes a movie of it and leaves out the important bits.30. be on time or early.31. ask the last question on your mind, even if it makes you look an ass.32.don’t assume anything.33. it’s not all about you.34.there is no dishonor in partial credit, but real legit a’s are best.35. what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.36. to avoid headaches-sip your bubble tea slowly.37. to avoid headaches-sip your whiskey slowly,too.38. get proficient in the use of chop sticks. it will serve you well.39. it’s always best to forgive and forget, but some grudges feel better to nurse.40. live as if you are running out of time. you are.